Introduction
The difference between children and adults lies in their capacity to make decisions. If we are not ready to make choices, things will not change.
As a famous saying goes, repeating the same actions but expecting different results is foolish. Many of us experienced emotional struggles last year and may still be facing challenges.
It is not enough to make decisions, but ability to make right one. (Deuteronomy 30:19)....I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live.
Even God cannot override your decision.
As responsible adults we don't make Resolutions, instead we take decisions.
Difference between Resolution and Decision
A resolution is a formal expression of opinion or will, while a decision is a formal action taken.
So, today I want to open you up to realities you can decide to follow.
Pardon me, for those who may not be christians reading this. But, the principles are universal, not just for certain religion. Believe it.
Relationship Resolutions for 2025
1. Improve your mind (Become wise). Ecclesiastes 8:1b ...A person’s wisdom brightens their face and changes its hard appearance.
Another important aspect that contributes to a person's attractiveness, aside from their physical appearance, is their intelligence. Commit to reading books, studying, researching, and expanding your knowledge this year. Developing your mind will make you a highly desirable individual.
How to Improve your mind
Read books
Observation
Learn to meditate
Ask questions
Associate yourself with intelligent people
A girl that has built her mind becomes so attractive to guys. A popular preacher said, "And a woman who buys and cares only for high hills without developing her mind has a low brain on high hills".
2. Always look presentable (Dress well, smell well)
Wash, put on perfume, and get dressed in your best clothes. Then go down to the threshing floor, but don’t let him know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking. (Ruth 3:3)
Before aunty Ruth could even go to meet Boaz she had to look presentable. Imagine if Ruth went there smelling like Aboki suya or cloth that have not dried.
There's something about how a person smells, people just like you, you just become attractive. Make up your mind to always maintain steeze (slangs for Nigerians). when meeting anyone or stepping out. Appear your best always.
3. Give friendship a chance.
The Lord recompense thy work, and a full reward be given thee of the Lord God of Israel, under whose wings thou art come to trust.
13 Then she said, Let me find favour in thy sight, my lord; for that thou hast comforted me, and for that thou hast spoken friendly unto thine handmaid, though I be not like unto one of thine handmaidens
While Boaz was toasting Ruth, you will notice she instead tried making everything about friendship, she redirected the conversation instead of falling straight for him.
Give people time, allow for friendship. “Friendship Unmasks people's real identity guys”. If friendship cannot survive relationship can't. Because all relationship requires to strive is friendship. When there's friendship Intimacy becomes easy. One of the reason while premarital sex has taken hold of this generation is majorly because there's no friendship. Nothing to really talk about but removing cloths. Things should be better now.
Mind you, don't give the friendship a time frame, just give it time and know them better.
Dating is not the time you guys gets to know each other, it is in friendship. Now dating is both of you agreeing to do life. The process from now till when you officially join is what dating is. If they rush in, they will also rush out.
4. Guard and pursue your Vision with Jealousy
But he said to me, ‘You will become pregnant and have a son. Now then, drink no wine or other fermented drink and do not eat anything unclean, because the boy will be a Nazarite of God from the womb until the day of his death.’ ” (Judges 13:7).
If you know the vision you are carry, you will be mindful of the things you engage in. Everyone is pursuing something, that's why I didn't just say pursue, I added Guard with Jealousy. Proverbs 31 says, men, don't give in to women who ruin kings.
Guys, is not every skirt you unveil this year, is not every plate you want to lick guys, (if you understood this part sha). But, You are a King, look for a Queen instead that fits your throne not jezebel, and Avoid Delilah.
Ladies, you are a Queen, avoid men that will destroy your destiny. You have a Dream, don't trade it because you want to move waist. I come in Peace.
5. Become an unforgettable person. (Be valuable) This one ehh, make up your mind that when someone comes close to you, they will miss you when they leave. (1 Samuel 25) It is a popular story of David and Abigail.
How to Become and Unforgettable Person
a).Smile when talking to people
b). Give eye contact
c). Listen attentively in communicating with people.
d). Make them laugh
e). Complement people
You never can tell, you can be making your future husband's younger brother comfortable. Make up your mind to be keen on communication. The Woman by the well that JESUS met was another unforgettable woman,
she knew how to keep someone comfortable.
6. Engage in Profitable relationships (Non-sexual). (John 12:3-6). Mary Anointed the feet of JESUS.
After Mary did what she did for JESUS it made them closer.
Imagine if Mary had scattered the closeness with romantic advances. Maybe Lazarus would not have come back alive. Because, it was the bond they shared that made JESUS to return for Lazarus.
It's not everyone opposite fine gender that comes around you that must climb your bed, and scream your name. Make up your mind to have some level of friendships that won't involve sex.
7. Do not give people the consent to hurt you (control your emotions). (Judges 11:4-10, Genesis 42.
There were two men in the bible with same encounter. Not to bore you, Joseph brothers hated him, but when he met them he forgave them
Jephthah was a very emotional man despite his strength. That's why out of emotions he made a vow to God and that vow broke him because he had to sacrifice his only child and daughter.
It is the job of no one to make you happy and it also means they cannot hurt you. Choose to not let people's presence determine your mood this year. Face your life and enjoy your own company.
People that will truly care and love you won't go away.
Trust God to send people that will stay. It is not about the people that came around you, it is about who stayed. Don't try to please people because when you are gone they will move on.
8. Get busy. (Ruth 2:7-8) Why not engage this year in Profitable work. Ruth met Boaz in place of duty. What if your new found healthy relationship is linked to you engaging in something meaningful this year.
While you are doing your ushering work, singing in church choir or working that's where your love may be. You have been offline, now go online. Engage yourself with something. Find purpose then love finds you. This is the formula.
9. Love God more. (Judges 16:19-20). Samson depended on his Hair to be strong, but as Christians, we are depending on the love of God through the Holy Spirit. (Romans 8:35, 39)
This year, God is reserving his best for those who love and spends time with Him. Make up your mind to trust and love God.
You have been doing it on your own, there's someone that is ready to Help you. JESUS said, come to me all who are burdened I will give you rest. There's rest, emotional rest in Christ.